overwhelmed; the good and the bad

I’m feeling overwhelmed, who doesn’t feel that way sometimes? In many different ways; the good, the bad. I can honestly say that  Stephen and I are SO overwhelmed with all the positive feedback and support we have received on the blog, Facebook, GoFundMe. I never imagined how my words and his situation would have such an impact on so many people. Our hearts are so full.  We are still trying to take it all in so please let me give out a formal “THANK YOU”  for everything. It is an amazing feeling to have so many people be interested and concerned about your situation.

And on a more serious note, I have been working with my friend Ginger the past few days on all things “social media”, and let me just say THAT is the true meaning of overwhelmed. I am not sure what and if we created the right pages? profiles? I’m not sure if we are supposed to “like” or “share”. We have been laughing while trying to navigate a world we  know just enough about to be dangerous.  We didn’t learn any of this in college…oh wait, there was NO SOCIAL MEDIA way back then. Seriously though, I feel like we just took a crash course and squeaked by with a “C”.  What an eye-opening experience. We thought we were savvy, but this lesson proved us wrong! So yes, we created a FB Page, SJ’s Hope, that you can “like” and it will have links to this page and any other important information…we think. Either way, we had a good time and got to laugh at ourselves for a little bit.

Being overwhelmed is something we all know about. We all have something that is weighing heavy on our hearts or minds. Sick kids, aging parents, jobs, health, the list can go on forever. I feel this word come across my lips daily. I want to quit something daily. But I don’t, I can’t….why? because “Stephen has MS and he never complains or quits, anything”. That is truly my life. I catch myself complaining about anything and sometimes he will offer me a kind word of concern, usually a joke and sometimes the “are you kidding me?” look and that usually puts it all into perspective. Living with someone with a chronic illness will keep you in check. That is for sure. But that is what helps, the reality check of it all. Knowing when to let go. Be happy. And now I’m so happy and excited. The possibility of something great is so close. I am overwhelmed! But this time, it is with optimism for the future.

Birthday!

Hi everyone! Today is Stephen’s 46th birthday. Yep, I’ve got myself an older man….by a few months. We are getting up there….creeping up on the big one. I won’t say it or put it in writing; makes it seem less real. ha! No major plans for today. He had physical therapy, work, and then we will go out to a nice dinner. His choice, but I’ll offer some suggestions, of course.

Ironically enough, I was with some girlfriends last night at a planning meeting for some upcoming fundraising events. One of my friends mentioned that her friend’s son was just diagnosed with MS. And she kept saying “…he’s just so young” and I asked…like a teenager? How young are we talking? MS isn’t as common in younger people so I was really curious. Then she says, “YOUNG!… I think they just had a baby”. I’m like “30ish” right? YES, she said.  That IS YOUNG. Seems like ages ago when we were celebrating thirty! Exactly 16 years ago… Stephen was diagnosed right after his 30th birthday. Hard to believe it when I think about it that way. I guess people said that about him when we learned of his diagnosis. “He’s so young, and they have a young baby…”

We celebrate him and his birthday every year, without fail, but it makes me wonder… but I’ve never asked him. Is it a bad reminder too? Does it make him think “this is the same time I learned of my MS and the constant reminder of what this disease has made my life look like, what it has done to my body?” I’ll say it again, he isn’t sitting around dwelling on this crappy hand he’s been dealt. But it has to make you think it is kind of a bittersweet celebration. Yay! I’ve made it another year, another year to be with my family, work, LIVE….and another year of MS.

But tonight we will go out. Have a nice dinner some wine and of course he ALWAYS wants dessert. We will reflect on the past year. The good times, the hard times, our family, friends and make a toast to another year. Even with MS, life is good…but always hoping it can be better. xoxo